Adam, you probably would excel at a dog story. A man is on a jogging trail, hears whimpering in the bushes beside the trail, and finds a dog with a bloody head injury. He calls the number on the tag; someone picks up the phone but immediately hangs up, and doesn't answer repeat calls. His vet treats the injury, and says it looks like a bullet crease. The ID chip provides the address, and the next day he drives the dog across town, but on approaching the house he sees several police cars and an ambulance. A shrouded body is being wheeled out on a stretcher. Knowing that he has a couple of unpaid speeding tickets, he doesn't want to speak to the police, but he has to see what's going on. He gets out of his car with the dog in his arms and mingles with the gathering crowd of onlookers. Just then, a burly, sour-faced police detective passes near his position and the man feels the dog stiffen with a low growl, teeth bared and fur bristling...